So today is the day when we share all the way our children entered our lives. Since I have two children I decided to do two entries. This one will be all about my oldest child, Lori, who is now 6 1/2.

After nine months of vomiting every time anything came near my mouth and being on bed rest for 4 months due to elevated blood pressure July 10th came.

The night before I had been on the couch watching tv as normal and at around 9 pm I suddenly became exhausted. Ordinarily after a whole day of doing nothing, I had problems sleeping. But that night, I was ready for bed. I could barely keep my eyes open. So I went to bed. I slept until around 9:30 the next morning and when I got up to go use the bathroom, I felt a sharp pain in my abdomen that didn't feel like my normal braxton-hicks contractions. I figured I needed to drink something and went downstairs to get some. Still more contractions. So I called my best friend and birth coach and told her "don't make plans, I think I may be in labor" She found out if I needed her to come get me now and after talking decided we'd wait until my scheduled OB appt. for 3:30 that afternoon.

By the time of my appt. my contractions are pretty regular. I go in and they take my blood pressure and have me lay down. My doctor comes in and asks if I'm stressed or anything, I say "No but I think I'm in labor" she said "oh, well why don't we check you" she sounded very doubting.

Well she checked and I was 4cm dilated and 80% effaced so I was sent to the hospital, which was conveniently next door. I was admitted and taken upstairs to the labor area. I was strapped in and was told my the nurse I was admitted not for my labor, but because my blood pressure was at seizure level. Not a good thing.

I lay very still while my body contracts. No walking around, no using a ball, nothing. Lay there and deal. Then the doctor on call here after referred to as Dr. Numskull. He came in and informed me, not asked, informed me he would be breaking my water because I wasn't laboring fast enough. He broke my water and my pain went from ow, to owholyhelllthebaby'scuttingit'swayout. The nurse was very helpful and helped me remember how to breathe and gave me something to take the edge off. She said I needed to stay as calm and relaxed as possible so I wouldn't have to have the Magnisum Sulfate during labor, because it can cause respiratory distress in the baby. It was enough to keep me focused on things other than labor pains, because really? Do you know you can feel the back of your head on the inside? It's very trippy. And something good to think about instead of your uterus trying to self destruct.

So after he breaks my water Dr. Numskull says he has a meeting, he'll be back to check on me in a couple hours, don't worry you're a first time mom it'll take a while.
The whole time I'm telling him not to leave. But he does. And about 15-20 minutes later, I inform the nurse I have to push. She says "oh I'm sure it's just some pressure, you don't need to push yet" Well turns out, I was 9 1/2 inches, so I was pretty ready to push. I wait a few more minutes to finish dilating and start pushing. One push, everyone scramble to get ready for baby. Two pushs, still no doctor. Three pushes, nurse catches the head basically by luck alone, as she had turned to grab a blanket and saw her head was nearly all the way out. Then Dr. Numskull rushes in, grabs gloves, and comes over. Everyone is telling me not to push, my body is pushing against my will. Dr. Numskull turns her shoulders and poof there's a baby girl. He places her on my stomach haphazardly. She starts to slip off my stomach so the nurse at my side picks her up a 1/4 inch and moves her to center on my stomach. My daughter kicks and the umbilical cord is wrapped around her foot and it breaks. Blood goes EVERYWHERE! The nurse is trying to grab the baby's umbilical cord the doctor is screaming "Clamp it Clamp it" and all around panicking. She clamps and Dr. Numskull starts screaming at her "You never pull the baby you stupid fucking bitch, you never pull the baby!" This in front of her peers, my mother, myself, my best friend. They take Lori to see if she's ok and clean her up.

Dr. Numskull informs me I've torn and will need stitches. He proceeds despite me telling him repeatedly that I am not numbed by the shot he gave and basically sweat it out until he's done . That hurt more than labor.

Then they brought this tiny little 6lb 14oz 20in long person who looked completely bewildered by what had just gone on and she latched right away. I was exhausted and sore and completely detached from this little person.

It took until I was off the blood pressure drugs for me to bond with her and name her.

But now she's my little girl, who wants badly to become a little woman.


Marie said...

With my son I didn't feel the stitches at all, they had numbed that area pretty well because it was a forceps birth. But with my daughter I'd had no drugs, and all the midwife could give me was something on a q-tip. Which does NOTHING. She wanted to do three stitches, I made her stop after the first one. The stitches were at least 10 times more painful than my drug-less labor.

Jessi said...

I can imagine. He did 5 and then did them poorly. Because of his wonderful job when we're done for sure having babies, I have to get extensive surgery down there. I never did heal up. I still have a huge canyon. Bleck! Sorry for the overshare!